The LDS Church - A Worldwide Family

I am in the midst of a month of traveling right now. I spent a week in Nevada, I'm currently in Florida and next week I'll be in Hawaii. Eventually I'll be back in California (if it hasn't been completely covered in fire and brimstone).

Whenever possible we attend church while we are away, and with over 12 million members throughout the world, and lessons and conference talks available on lds.org it is nearly always possible. And it is wonderful to know that wherever we are in the world, regardless of language and cultural differences, we will always be welcomed and always feel at home when we attend church elsewhere.

Every ward in the world is teaching the same lessons, albeit not always on the same week our ward does, but I love knowing that we are able to hear the word of the Lord in the way He wants us to hear it regardless of where we are.

And knowing that no matter where we are, the Americas, Europe, Asia, the South Pacific or wherever, we are never more than a phone-call away from new friends, brothers & sisters, who are willing to help us if we find ourselves in need.

I love the gospel of Jesus Christ. I love the instant love and acceptance we share with one another. I love the fact that God loves us so much that he is constantly giving us opportunity to understand that all of us - everyone on Earth - are His children. He loves all of us and knows us by name - regardless. I find great comfort in that knowledge.

Can you imagine a world filled with such?

Faith & the Pursuit of Spiritual Growth

My daughter-in-law, son and I were talking today about spiritual planes, specifically if it is part of the human condition to have difficulty visualizing how your own life would be different if you were at a higher spiritual plane than you are now. That got me thinking.

My first thought was to answer in the affirmative. When we are living the gospel the best we know how it can feel like we are at times overcome with the spirit. We tend to remember those moments as long as we continue to live the gospel the best we can. But if we allow ourselves to drift away from the influence of the Holy Spirit then those sacred, spiritual memories of basking in the light of Christ can be removed from our conscious thought.

When we look at others who we admire in the church it is often difficult for us to imagine that we will ever be as "good" or as "spiritual" as they are. But that is because we cannot see around life's corners. We cannot predict with great accuracy how we will grow spiritually over a given period of time. We only have our past and present life to help us to predict our future.

But God can see around our corners. He knows just what trials we need to go through in order to grow in the direction that will benefit us and our family the most. And that is where faith comes in. We not only need to understand that we have lot's of spiritual grow-room, but we need to trust that the Lord will provide us a path on which to pursue a higher spiritual plane.

Those who are perhaps older and more experienced in life may seem to be on a higher spiritual plane, and perhaps they are; but it is more likely that their life experiences have enabled them to evolved spiritually over time. They are not better than the rest of us, they have just had time to smooth out a few more of their rough spots. And all of us will be given opportunities to do the same.

Halo-3 & Evangelical Churches Promoting Violence

The video game Halo 3 was released just 3 weeks ago and already sales have topped 3 million dollars. That isn't my story.

The real story is about the hundreds of protestant churches, including many Baptist and Evangelical denominations, who are promoting the violent game of murder and bloodshed to the youth in their areas. Due to graphic bloodshed, violence and a focus on murder, the game has been rated M for mature players. In fact you have to be at least 17 years old to purchase it. But that hasn't stopped church leaders from promoting and offering it to any child who is willing to come to the church to play it.

In fact many of the churches have purchased more televisions so that they can accommodate more youth who want to play the game. Never mind if the reason the kids don't own the game is because their parents don't approve of it. The ministers are so desperate to bump up their youth attendance stats that, as one pasture stated to CNN today, they are willing to "use the Devil if it will get kids to go to church."

In fact the kids don't have to attend a religion class in exchange for being allowed to play the game, and most do not. In providing Halo, churches are permitting access to adult-themed material that young people cannot buy on their own.

“If you want to connect with young teenage boys and drag them into church, free alcohol and pornographic movies would do it,” said James Tonkowich, president of the Institute on Religion and Democracy, a nonprofit group that assesses denominational policies.

The excuse that "everyone is doing it" doesn't make it right to use something as a missionary tool. However that is exactly the argument these church leaders are using to rationalize their decision to promote the "joy of killing" video game. In my opinion,when it comes to Christlike living, the end does not justify the means.

“It’s very pervasive,” said Mr. Palmer a Southern Baptist area leader. His organization recently sent e-mail messages to 50,000 young people about how to share their faith by using Halo 3.

At Sweetwater Baptist Church in Lawrenceville, Ga., Austin Brown, 16, said, “We play Halo, take a break and have something to eat, and have a lesson,” explaining that the pastor tried to draw parallels "between God and the devil. But I just like playing the game. It is just fun to blow people up.”

I am so happy to work with the youth in our ward. Boys and girls alike get up at dawn to attend seminary class before going to school. We pray, sing, study the scriptures and I teach a lesson. There are no video games involved, just a love for the gospel and the fulfilling presence of the Holy Spirit. You can't get that with violent, adult themed, video games.
quotes from: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/07/us/07halo.html?_r=1&adxnnl=1&oref=slogin&adxnnlx=1191903520-VuLkiQr74TDBijE5XJ3c3w

Catholics do Baptism for the Dead

Perhaps this is common knowledge - I have been known to be ignorant from time to time - but because my Catholic friends seem perplexed by our baptism for the dead ordinance I guess I assumed that we were the only church who did it. Not so.

OK, some will say that I am taking this out of context, and perhaps I am, but basically I don't see much difference. The "this" I'm referring to is the tradition for Catholics to baptize babies who die before they are able to be baptized while alive. One of my boys went to South America on his mission and so did my daughter-in-law. She said that it was common for dead babies to be brought to the church and baptized before being buried.

So, I ask, what is the difference between baptizing someone who has been dead for several hours or a day and someone who has been dead for a hundred years? Dead is dead. The spirit has left the vessel and resides in heaven, or the spirit world or whatever word you refer to as the afterlife.

Of course there are differences. One being that when we baptize we believe that it is actually the person in spirit - not the flesh - who accepts or rejects the ordinance. Eventually that person will get their physical body back, but it isn't the body that the ordinance is done for. It is our spirit that is housed in our body that makes all of our choices in life, not our flesh. And it is our spirit in the afterlife that will be in control - not our flesh.

Perhaps some protestant churches baptize their dead before burying them, I'll have to look into that. But for now at least I understand how I can better explain our ordinances to others in a way they can accept and understand.

Can Mormons be Vegans?

I remember years ago learning in some class or meeting that being a vegetarian was not living the gospel. The thought was that by following and understanding the Word of Wisdom we would eat meat when other fresh foods were not available. But when grains, fruits and vegetables were in season we should focus on them instead of on meat.

Well, for those of us who live in the United Stated and other countries where produce is available all year round, how do we reconcile eating meat at all? On the other hand, even those of us who profess to follow the Word of Wisdom, most of us don't truly follow it to the letter of the law. In our "1st world" of plenty we have all varieties of foods available to us nearly all year long. We can eat a meal with meat & grain & veggies & fruits any time we wish. I've yet to meet anyone who only eats meat during the coldest winter months. So how, in this modern era of food production, do we figure out how to best follow the Word of Wisdom so that when we are at our next temple recommend interview we can feel honest about the answer we give?

Because of the constant availability of legumes, lentils, whole grain products and soy products along with the regular fruits and fresh/frozen veggies, eating meat may not be necessary anymore in our culture. Hmmm...

About 20 years ago a friend of mine became a vegetarian and soon the whole family followed suit. At first I was terrified. Afraid that they would be scolded by the leaders of the church or that they were on the verge of apostasy. I was wrong on both counts. My friend's family members were all very obese, she had diabetes and other health problems and her new son-in-law talked them into trying the new lifestyle for just a few weeks to see how they felt about it. So they did.

They didn't become vegetarians because they were protesting the killing of animals to satisfy our gluttonous desires. They were doing it to see if their health would improve. Within just three months it became obvious to all who knew them that whatever they were doing was really helping them. They all lost weight slowly and healthfully. Their diabetes became so easy to control with the diet that they were able to go off their meds. It was like a miracle.

Now two decades later, I have diabetes and I've become obese (60 lbs overweight) and I am looking for help to get my health back, my stamina back and my figure back. So I started listening to lectures by medical doctors who were right on the forefront of learning exactly how to cure diabetes (even in the most ill patients) by healing their bodies from the inside out - strengthening their cell membranes, sloughing the fat off the cells that were preventing the body from utilizing insulin in the best way, and by healing the whole body rather than just treating a symptom.

The research has recently shown that by eating a completely vegan diet (no meat, dairy or eggs), one can see marked improvements in just two weeks and within a year they can be cured of type 1 or type 2 diabetes. Then the researchers started treating severely ill people with heart disease who were not expected to live long, and out of 100 people put on a strict Vegan diet, over 80 of them grew new, stronger veins to their hearts and their cholesterol levels went down so fast that they had to stop taking their pills. The other 20 people improved enough to be able to avoid surgery and all are still alive as of this writing. Surprisingly, their arthritis also went away and everyone lost weight even those who did not exercise. And one woman in the study who had cancerous polyps had a miraculous recovery as the cancer and the polyps disappeared.

So I am now a Mormon and a Vegan. It has nearly been a week now. I told my Bishop about it and he supported me 100%. The reason is because I'm not taking the stand that killing animals for food is a horrible thing. I am doing it because I want to do whatever I can, in a natural, God given way, to nourish my body the way it deserves to be nourished. I want to do my part to treat it like the temple that it is.

So far after less than a week, my blood sugar has gotten down to normal range for the first time in over 2 years, the arthritis in my fingers is nearly gone and I have lost 4 pounds without letting myself get the least bit hungry. Without exercise I should loose about a pound a week, but with exercise I will loose about 2 pounds a week. What a great perk!

If you want information or the books that I have read leave a comment and I'll get back to you.

Sibling Marriage and Other Tolerance Issues

This afternoon in my RS meeting I helped teach the lesson on marriage and how the world is turning away from marriage and the nuclear family. Of course the issue of "gay marriage" is frequently in the media, but the other day I saw a news-type show featuring a brother and sister who were a "couple" and wanted sibling marriage to be legalized. Their premise was that if we authorized gay marriage then we should also legalize any union between two or more people without prejudice - even siblings.

I know, to most people this sounds preposterous. But when you look back just a few decades, so did the idea of gay marriage. Our Western European culture has for years stressed the importance of tolerance saying that we need to get over the Victorian belief that the only true marriage is between a man and a woman. However many who have professed this attitude would themselves be intolerant of sibling marriage, child marriage and say, pedophilia based marriages.

I suppose my point is that when people vehemently profess tolerance for all, they are really only wanting tolerance for their own deviant lifestyle. They would have us believe that a line should not be drawn, but they themselves would draw a line somewhere.

So where should we, the LDS community draw our line? Thank God, we have been given the sacred counsel from the first presidency in the form of the Proclamation on the Family to help us understand the sanctity of marriage and to whom it should apply. That is where the Lord drew his line and no societal changes should alter our opinion. It is a tried and true principle that works here on Earth and in the eternities. It may not make everyone in the world happy, but then, no righteous principle does.

There will always be those who want to write their own ticket to eternal life. But that just isn't the way the plan works.

Mitt Romney and Media Induced Missionary Moments

There seems to be a lot of media this summer regarding the LDS church and it's beliefs. Some believe that it is the liberal media's way of making sure Mitt Romney isn't the Republican choice for the Presidency. Others believe that the media is unwittingly helping his campaign and that the often one sided media is actually increasing public interest in the church.

Whatever the reason, I know that it has sparked questions from some of my friends who haven't previously been at all curious about what I believe. Suddenly people are asking me about what I think of the latest media story. Some have been enticed to participate in lengthy discussions about the gospel.

Although I have read and re-read the scriptures several times in my life, I am not a scriptorian. But I have found that when I ask God to help me answer their questions in a manner that would be pleasing to him, I am always blessed with the right words, and most importantly, the right spirit. Nervousness is excusable, contention and defensiveness is not.

These are times in which having a testimony is invaluable, and living well is the best way to show others who we are and what we stand for. Let's polish our testimonies, study the scriptures and pray that we will be a helpful tool for the Lord. That way you won't be caught totally off guard when someone asks you that golden question.

Should Dating LDS Couples Kiss?

How much physical affection is demonstrated in an intimate relationship will be, and needs to be, different for every couple. However living the gospel can be a great foundation for couples who want, and or need, to set some limits.

Here are a few thoughts about what those limits should be.

1. The age and dating experience of the individuals involved plays a huge role in determining what those limits should be. Although physical attraction is universal regardless of age, the younger and less experienced a person is the more likely they will be to allow themselves to get caught up in the physical pleasures of an intimate relationship.

This is because the newness of physical affection and the power it can have on one's ability to put the breaks on makes it very difficult to say stop. Our brains aren't fully developed until around age 23. Before then we lack the ability to make the most rational decisions regarding the consequences to our behaviors. Consequently, prior to age 23 or so, your limits should be very conservative. A kiss goodnight, at the door, after a date, may be as far as you agree to go. Anything else can easily lead to behaviors that will later be regretted.

2. Rules often seem old fashioned, but physical attraction and sexual desire have been the same since Adam and Eve. That is the way God created us so that we would be able to reproduce. And since the beginning of the human race, couples who have not set firm boundaries and limits regarding their dating behaviors have ended up paying an enormous price for indiscretion.

Any time a couple allows themselves to become intimate to the point of spending their time together experiencing the physical pleasures of intimacy they are putting themselves at risk. Even "making out" can lead to crossing boundaries that would not be crossed if a limit had been agreed upon ahead of time. You can be sexual with any one, but getting to know another person for who they really are requires spending time together doing things that allow you to experience them in non sexual ways.

So if your goal is to get a short-lived thrill that you may later regret, spend your time together exploring each other physically. But if your goal is to get to know your date, or to determine if you want to pursue a long lasting relationship, set your limits to a single but meaningful kiss at the door.

The rule of thumb is to never allow yourself to engage in an activity that you would be embarrassed for your mother to witness.

Be an Imperfect Parent

Around age 6-7 children begin to see their parents’ humanness. They begin to wonder why mom says “don’t take what doesn’t belong to you,” and then eats a grape at the grocery story while shopping. “Isn’t that stealing mom?”

We want our children to learn perfect principles and sometimes we mistakenly expect more from them than we expect from ourselves. But what should a parent do when they have done something so obviously wrong that even their little children notice?

Just as you tell your children that “honesty is the best policy,” when you do something wrong you have to be able to own up to it and come clean with your child. Admit that what you did was wrong. If the infraction was against them, apologize. If someone else was involved tell your child how you plan to make it right. And if there was no other injured party, tell your child that you know that what you did was wrong. Let them know that you make mistakes too and that you try very hard to make as few as possible.

In short, be an example. Being honest with your child about your own humanness will help them feel less troubled about their own. Showing them how you handle your mistakes shows them how to handle theirs. Yes, they will eventually figure out that you aren’t perfect but in the process they will learn valuable life lessons. And isn’t that what parenting is all about?

More parenting tips at http://www.psych-net.com

Living With Adversity Part 1

This story was originally printed in the Manchester, England, Guardian and later reprinted in the Deseret News. And eventually it was told by President Hinkley in General Conference several years ago.
A hurricane had hit the West Indies, and a bricklayer was sent to repair the damage. He wrote to the home office as follows:
"Respected Sirs:
"When I got to the building I found that the hurricane had knocked some bricks off the top. So I rigged up a beam with a pulley at the top of the building and hoisted up a couple of barrels full of bricks. When I had fixed the building, there was a lot of bricks left over. I hoisted the barrel back up again and secured the line at the bottom, and then went up and filled the barrel with the extra bricks. Then I went to the bottom and cast off the line. Unfortunately the barrel of bricks was heavier than I was, and before I knew what was happening the barrel started down, jerking me off the ground. I decided to hang on, and halfway up I met the barrel coming down and received a severe blow on the shoulder. I then continued to the top, banging my head against the beam and getting my finger jammed in the pulley. When the barrel hit the ground it bursted its bottom, allowing all the bricks to spill out. I was now heavier than the barrel and so started down again at high speed. Halfway down, I met the barrel coming up and received severe injuries to my shins. When I hit the ground I landed on the bricks, getting several painful cuts from the sharp edges. At this point I must have lost my presence of mind because I let go of the line. The barrel then came down, giving me another heavy blow on the head and putting me in hospital. I respectfully request sick leave."

Suffering comes to all of us. Sometimes it is mental. Sometimes it is physical. Sometimes it may even be spiritual.

Adversity, in one form or another, is the universal experience of mankind. It is the common lot of all men [and women] to experience misfortune, suffering, sickness, or other adversities. Often our work is arduous and unnecessarily demanding. Our faith is tried in various ways—sometimes unjustly tried. At times it seems that even God is punishing us. One of the things that makes adversity so hard to bear is that we feel as if we alone have been chosen for this affliction while others presumably escape trial and adversity.

On one occasion, in the presence of the Prophet Joseph Smith, someone commented that a person was suffering affliction because of his sins. The Prophet Joseph responded that that was an unhallowed statement to make—that afflictions come to all.
Likewise, President Harold B. Lee related the story of a seriously ill infant who had just received a blessing; a man who was present observed: "This is one of our finest and most faithful families. I don't know why they should be thus afflicted."

Some misunderstand. It does not necessarily follow that righteousness immunizes us against adversity. President Lee taught us that living the gospel of Jesus Christ is no guarantee that adversity will not come into our lives; but living the gospel does give us the strength and faith and power to rise above that adversity and look beyond the present trouble to the brighter day.

Too often we are shortsighted as we view the effects of adversity in our life. We fail to see the purifying and refining effect wrought by the flames of adversity. These flames are not meant to consume, but to purify us. Disguised as adversity, blessings are showered upon us.

Henry Ward Beecher said, "Affliction comes to us all, not to make us sad, but sober; not to make us sorry, but to make us wise; not to make us despondent, but by its darkness to refresh us as the night refreshes the day; not to impoverish, but to enrich us.

I often counsel my clients to refrain from believing that their depressive mood or their current oppressive situation will last forever. In fact it will not. The good news is that all feelings are transient and so are the trials in our life. Our work is to grow past our defeatist moods and to discover the best way to survive our most harrowing trials. In so doing we are given the opportunity to turn our weakness into our strengths; and to then help others as they are faced with their most harrowing trials.
Thomas Carlyle wrote "Out of the lowest depths, there is a path to the loftiest heights."

Lives of great people teach us that many of them rose to significant achievement because of their adversities. We may never become great in worldly terms, but we are great in our Heavenly Father’s eyes, in the eyes of our children and we have been given the opportunity to become our own greatest ally in our pursuit of eternal glory if we determine to learn from our dark moments. Our capacity to endure suffering is a spiritual attribute.

Elder A. Theodore Tuttle Of the First Council of the Seventy offered this:
“Those who have been driven to their knees in weakness, grief, and humility commune with God not in the learned cliches of prayer, but in heartfelt, soul-revealing communion. And when our Father sustains and assures a tested faith and a tested love, they learn the sweetness of adversity.”

While living the gospel will not necessarily temper the elements, it will temper you so you can endure the trials. Come with patience to your afflictions.

Sweet indeed are the uses of adversity. If we bear adversity well, we can learn the principle enunciated by Moroni: “ wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith." (Eth. 12:6.)

We need to have faith that the Lord is watching over us and He will not allow us to falter as long as we lean on him.

Credits: Photo named "We Shall Overcome" is by By Noel

Who's a Member of Your Ward?

Mormons are just people, regular, human-type people. Sure, we have knowledge and opportunities that have been offered to us and we have a path to follow that not everyone understands, but other than that, we are just like anyone else.

Why do I bring this up? Because, while we have been given much, we sometimes forget that we, and the other members of our wards and stakes, are human too. So I have compiled some typical, ward statistics that I thought you might find interesting.

• One out of every 100 people in the average ward population has been diagnosed with schizophrenia.
• Ten percent of your ward population has experienced depression this year and half of them deal with a lifetime of depressive episodes. Forty-five percent of your ward members experience an episode of depression sometime before the age of 45.
• Fifteen percent of the general population has a diagnosable personality disorder.
• 0.5 – 2.5 percent of your ward population suffers with clinical paranoia.
• Two percent of your ward population has Antisocial Personality Disorder (formerly known as sociopaths)
• Two percent have incurable Borderline Personality Disorder
• One percent is diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and another 15% have significant symptoms of the disorder.
• Five percent have a schizoid or schizotypal disorder.
• Ten percent are significantly physically disabled.
• 2.6 to 3.4% are legally blind.
• 8.2% have significant hearing impairments – 0.8% have severe to profound hearing impairments.
• Three percent are mentally retarded.
• Between one and eight percent of children have specific learning disabilities.
• Between 0.5-1.5% have recurring seizures.
• Twenty-four percent have been divorced at least once.
• And 0.320% of all incarcerated people are LDS.

Let’s get about the business of loving our neighbors and spend much less time judging each other.