The Two Sides of Adversity

“As ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light; yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort”(see Mosiah 18:8–9).

As members of a ward family we are often called upon to assist in caring for others in our ward who need physical, emotional and spiritual help. Doing so not only brings blessings to those who are in need but it helps us, the provider, deepen our compassion, feel needed, and live less selfishly.

All of us will experience the difficulties that this life can bring; surviving difficulty is a large part of our journey in this estate. Growing through those difficulties is not just about learning the lesson of the trial, but it is about humbling ourselves enough to ask for and to receive help from others.

Both sides of adversity can be a growing experience. In the long run, the adversity of one can benefit the lives of many as long as humility and compassion work together. Bishop Richard C. Edgley, First Counselor in the Presiding Bishopric related the following in Conference last October:

"From bearing one another’s burdens as ward members, we have learned several lessons:

1. The Lord’s organization is fully adequate to know and care for those with even the most dire emotional and spiritual needs.
2. Adversity can bring us closer to God, with a renewed and enlightened appreciation for prayer and the Atonement, which covers pain and suffering in all their manifestations.
3. Members who suffer tragedy firsthand often experience an increased capacity for love, compassion, and understanding. They become the first, last, and often the most effective responders in giving comfort and showing compassion to others.
4. A ward, as well as a family, draws closer together as it endures together—what happens to one happens to all.
5. And perhaps most important, we can each be more compassionate and caring because we have each had our own personal trials and experiences to draw from. We can endure together."

I have experienced both sides of diversity and I have also been blessed with enormous growth from each side. Let's be grateful for our ward family and for the challenges the Lord gives us to work through. In the arms of our ward family we never have to tackle hardship alone.

Living With Adversity Part 1

This story was originally printed in the Manchester, England, Guardian and later reprinted in the Deseret News. And eventually it was told by President Hinkley in General Conference several years ago.
A hurricane had hit the West Indies, and a bricklayer was sent to repair the damage. He wrote to the home office as follows:
"Respected Sirs:
"When I got to the building I found that the hurricane had knocked some bricks off the top. So I rigged up a beam with a pulley at the top of the building and hoisted up a couple of barrels full of bricks. When I had fixed the building, there was a lot of bricks left over. I hoisted the barrel back up again and secured the line at the bottom, and then went up and filled the barrel with the extra bricks. Then I went to the bottom and cast off the line. Unfortunately the barrel of bricks was heavier than I was, and before I knew what was happening the barrel started down, jerking me off the ground. I decided to hang on, and halfway up I met the barrel coming down and received a severe blow on the shoulder. I then continued to the top, banging my head against the beam and getting my finger jammed in the pulley. When the barrel hit the ground it bursted its bottom, allowing all the bricks to spill out. I was now heavier than the barrel and so started down again at high speed. Halfway down, I met the barrel coming up and received severe injuries to my shins. When I hit the ground I landed on the bricks, getting several painful cuts from the sharp edges. At this point I must have lost my presence of mind because I let go of the line. The barrel then came down, giving me another heavy blow on the head and putting me in hospital. I respectfully request sick leave."

Suffering comes to all of us. Sometimes it is mental. Sometimes it is physical. Sometimes it may even be spiritual.

Adversity, in one form or another, is the universal experience of mankind. It is the common lot of all men [and women] to experience misfortune, suffering, sickness, or other adversities. Often our work is arduous and unnecessarily demanding. Our faith is tried in various ways—sometimes unjustly tried. At times it seems that even God is punishing us. One of the things that makes adversity so hard to bear is that we feel as if we alone have been chosen for this affliction while others presumably escape trial and adversity.

On one occasion, in the presence of the Prophet Joseph Smith, someone commented that a person was suffering affliction because of his sins. The Prophet Joseph responded that that was an unhallowed statement to make—that afflictions come to all.
Likewise, President Harold B. Lee related the story of a seriously ill infant who had just received a blessing; a man who was present observed: "This is one of our finest and most faithful families. I don't know why they should be thus afflicted."

Some misunderstand. It does not necessarily follow that righteousness immunizes us against adversity. President Lee taught us that living the gospel of Jesus Christ is no guarantee that adversity will not come into our lives; but living the gospel does give us the strength and faith and power to rise above that adversity and look beyond the present trouble to the brighter day.

Too often we are shortsighted as we view the effects of adversity in our life. We fail to see the purifying and refining effect wrought by the flames of adversity. These flames are not meant to consume, but to purify us. Disguised as adversity, blessings are showered upon us.

Henry Ward Beecher said, "Affliction comes to us all, not to make us sad, but sober; not to make us sorry, but to make us wise; not to make us despondent, but by its darkness to refresh us as the night refreshes the day; not to impoverish, but to enrich us.

I often counsel my clients to refrain from believing that their depressive mood or their current oppressive situation will last forever. In fact it will not. The good news is that all feelings are transient and so are the trials in our life. Our work is to grow past our defeatist moods and to discover the best way to survive our most harrowing trials. In so doing we are given the opportunity to turn our weakness into our strengths; and to then help others as they are faced with their most harrowing trials.
Thomas Carlyle wrote "Out of the lowest depths, there is a path to the loftiest heights."

Lives of great people teach us that many of them rose to significant achievement because of their adversities. We may never become great in worldly terms, but we are great in our Heavenly Father’s eyes, in the eyes of our children and we have been given the opportunity to become our own greatest ally in our pursuit of eternal glory if we determine to learn from our dark moments. Our capacity to endure suffering is a spiritual attribute.

Elder A. Theodore Tuttle Of the First Council of the Seventy offered this:
“Those who have been driven to their knees in weakness, grief, and humility commune with God not in the learned cliches of prayer, but in heartfelt, soul-revealing communion. And when our Father sustains and assures a tested faith and a tested love, they learn the sweetness of adversity.”

While living the gospel will not necessarily temper the elements, it will temper you so you can endure the trials. Come with patience to your afflictions.

Sweet indeed are the uses of adversity. If we bear adversity well, we can learn the principle enunciated by Moroni: “ wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith." (Eth. 12:6.)

We need to have faith that the Lord is watching over us and He will not allow us to falter as long as we lean on him.

Credits: Photo named "We Shall Overcome" is by By Noel

Who's a Member of Your Ward?

Mormons are just people, regular, human-type people. Sure, we have knowledge and opportunities that have been offered to us and we have a path to follow that not everyone understands, but other than that, we are just like anyone else.

Why do I bring this up? Because, while we have been given much, we sometimes forget that we, and the other members of our wards and stakes, are human too. So I have compiled some typical, ward statistics that I thought you might find interesting.

• One out of every 100 people in the average ward population has been diagnosed with schizophrenia.
• Ten percent of your ward population has experienced depression this year and half of them deal with a lifetime of depressive episodes. Forty-five percent of your ward members experience an episode of depression sometime before the age of 45.
• Fifteen percent of the general population has a diagnosable personality disorder.
• 0.5 – 2.5 percent of your ward population suffers with clinical paranoia.
• Two percent of your ward population has Antisocial Personality Disorder (formerly known as sociopaths)
• Two percent have incurable Borderline Personality Disorder
• One percent is diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and another 15% have significant symptoms of the disorder.
• Five percent have a schizoid or schizotypal disorder.
• Ten percent are significantly physically disabled.
• 2.6 to 3.4% are legally blind.
• 8.2% have significant hearing impairments – 0.8% have severe to profound hearing impairments.
• Three percent are mentally retarded.
• Between one and eight percent of children have specific learning disabilities.
• Between 0.5-1.5% have recurring seizures.
• Twenty-four percent have been divorced at least once.
• And 0.320% of all incarcerated people are LDS.

Let’s get about the business of loving our neighbors and spend much less time judging each other.